Here’s the catch: your focus determines your reality. If you spend your time gathering evidence that life is hard, unfair, or stacked against you, guess what? You’ll find it. But if you shift your focus to a narrative of possibility, growth, and empowerment, you’ll start to notice the opportunities and support that align with that mindset.

I know the fears, doubts, and feelings of despair that come with abuse. I also know that finding your way out isn’t just about leaving a harmful situation—it’s about reclaiming your sense of self, building resilience, and learning to trust your voice again.

I’m not here to tell you to try harder in 2025. If all you did was survive 2024, that’s enough.
But I also know, that if you’re reading this, it’s because you want more. You want to be thriving. It’s not too much to ask.

Disorganized attachment reflects an inner conflict—bouncing between anxious behaviors that seek closeness and avoidant behaviors that fear it. This push and pull can feel exhausting, yet strangely familiar, as it echoes the chaos of early caregiving experiences.

Avoidant attachment is a reflection of past survival strategies, not a permanent identity. With courage and the right tools, avoidants can embrace vulnerability, deepen their connections, and build secure, fulfilling relationships.

The journey to healing from anxious attachment doesn’t happen overnight, but every small step you take toward understanding your needs and nurturing yourself makes a profound difference. Even if you’ve spent a lifetime caught in patterns of anxious attachment, it’s never too late to change. You deserve the security, trust, and peace that you’ve been seeking.

Building secure attachment starts with connecting to yourself first. While we can’t change the past, we can gain insight from it, bringing it to consciousness where real change is possible.

Early connections lay the foundation for how we see ourselves and the world: Is the world safe? Am I enough? How can I find love and connection? These are some of the questions our minds answer, even as young children, through the quality of our early bonds.

This journey isn’t about changing who you are but reclaiming all that you’ve always been. Every step you take to reconnect with these pieces, no matter how small, is a gift to yourself. 

Whatever the holiday season looks like for you, know I’m here as an invisible advocate, cheering you on through it all.